I Miss You
by Flywheel Shyster and Flywheel
Summary: It was over in the blink(-182) of an eye. He was left missing her.


_**I Miss You**_

_Left..._

_Right..._

_Left..._

_Right..._

'_Why did I get out of bed?' _The pharmacy was overwhelmed, the news having reported the chance of catching some Peruvian Instant Darkness Sickness if you ate tomatoes and cucumbers _at least _once a month just that morning.

People were packed, wall to wall; some pacing restlessly, some slumbering in the plastic chairs, some voicing their irritation over the slow service. But there was one person, one young man who wasn't there for something as trivial as the latest obscure disease outbreak. There was one young man who came into the pharmacy every two weeks at noon, like clockwork.

_Left..._

_Right..._

_Right..._

_Right..._

_Left..._

For the last year, the man had stepped into the locale, putting out a cigarette as he pulled open the door.

"Hello, Mr. Hammer!" Everyone working there knew his name by now and always made sure to greet him. Even if ever he acknowledged them, it was through nothing more than a weak nod. Pills on the counter, money in hand, done. No words needed, it was like a well rehearsed dance.

_Left..._

_Left..._

_Right..._

And just outside the door, he would light another cigarette.

Mr. Hammer had been into the pharmacy 26 times. He only ever spoke once.

_**Hello there  
The angel from my nightmare**_

"Ed Firefly, Allison Reynolds."

"Eddy McGee, Leslie Hunter."

"Eddward Hammer, Marie Kanker."

"Wait, _what?_"

"Pardon, Mr. Hammer?"

"Nothing, nothing, Mr. Alva." Once every year, Peach Creek High School's science teacher, Mr. Alva, paired up his two classes to have, what he described during his first tenured year as, 'an opportunity to gain perspective from a person one does not usually converse with and as a result, create something scientifically magnificent or some shit like that'.

"I thought Ed had it bad, being paired with Reynolds. But man, you sure are _fucked_." The three friends, Ed, Eddward and Eddy, were walking through the vast sea of students that poured of the classrooms and into the halls after Mr. Alva had explained the sort of projects the many duos could create.

"Oh, I hope not, Eddy." Said young man quieted for a second before bursting out laughing.

"Double-D, you dog! I didn't even mean it that way!" A blush spread across Eddward's, Double-D's, embarrassed cheeks.

"Oh my..."

They made their ways to the lockers to grab their things, Eddy not wavering from his task as right hand man to inform Double-D just how fucked he really was.

"I'm talking Wilt Chamberlain fucked here!" That was the least graphical example for a good ten minutes.

"Okay, I get it, Eddy! I'm fucked!"

"I'm talking- What?" Eddy stopped mid-sentence to gape at his friend; Ed pulling his head out of a pile of trash in his locker to do the same.

"What?" Double-D looked from Ed to Eddy, curious as to what had caused their sudden halt in movements. "Is there something on my face?"

"Will we die now, Eddy?"

"I think so, Ed..."

"What is the matter with you two?!"

"You cursed..." Double-D stared, flabbergasted, at his friends before groaning loudly and gently banging his head against the locker next to his.

"I think we broke Double-D, Eddy."

"Wouldn't be the first time, Monobrow." The shortest of the three grinned and turned back to his locker, digging for his science book that had been buried and forgotten the very day he received it.

"Mercy..." Double-D glanced into his own locker to see what he was going to need for the weekend. '_Except perhaps a leash for Marie._'

"Huh, I always thought this was my math book. The things you know." Eddy emerged from his locker, casually flipping through the newfound science book. "Hey, Double-D, do you think-"

"No, Eddy, this time I can't help you with your project; you have to talk and decide upon a project with Leslie."

"Oh, come on! Why do I have to-"

"I'm sorry, Eddy, but there mere thought that I would help you with this project is pure cockamamie!" Double-D returned to his locker, grabbed his bag and sighed at his friend's silence. "Eddy, that wasn't even a-"He looked up and was surprised to see that Ed and Eddy were nowhere to be seen, their lockers still wide open. "-Swear?" There were only two reasons his friends took off that fast; the incoming presence of a teacher or...

"Hi, Oven mitt." One of the notorious Kanker sisters. Double-D spun around to find himself face to face with the sister who had decided that he was hers. And now he was. Her project partner.

"H-Hello there, Marie."

_**The shadow in the background of the morgue**_

"Mr. Hammer?" She was there, looming in the background. He was thankful for it; even if it wasn't him, the very thought of the possibility was... Heartbreaking.

"Okay." The doctor pulled the sheet back and Double-D let go of a breath he didn't realize he had been holding. Her hand quickly found his and he turned away, into her comforting arms.

"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry." They say that the good die young. Eddy McGee was no exception.

_**The unsuspecting victim of darkness in the valley**_

"Fucking Double-D..." She raised her arm to dry the tears rolling down her cheeks with the already drenched sleeve of her hoodie.

She didn't know where she was, she didn't know where she was going and she didn't care. There was nothing in her world anymore; no sisters, no school, no stupid boyfriend. Just her, in a car, on the road. They way she fantasized it would be when she was a little girl.

The radio was blasting... Something, she couldn't focus on it. Her mind kept replaying the last couple of hours in her head. The rage in her boyfriend's eyes, the vase he'd thrown into the wall and the last look of sorrow and disappointment before she slammed the door shut behind her.

It was stupid. They were stronger than this; they could easily get past this. She loved him, he loved her.

But... He had said some things, she had _definitely _said some things and... She was scared that he wouldn't forgive her this time.

_**We can live like Jack and Sally if we want  
Where you can always find me**_

The Cul-de-Sac on Rathink Avenue was puzzled. Double-D hadn't shown up for school and didn't answer phone or door that day. After Eddy had so graciously decided to pick the lock and search through the Hammer house, all the street's inhabitants had gathered in the middle of the street for a meeting and sufficient to say, some were more worried than others.

"Eh, he's probably just dorking off in the garage or something." Kevin, the everlasting jock, rolled his eyes.

"Stop it, Kevin! What if he's lying somewhere, really hurt? It's getting dark soon too!" Nazz, the teenage dream of most boys, slapped her boyfriend's arm.

"Double-D must be so scared, in the snow without his friend Ed, with NOTHING TO PROTECT HIM FROM THE WHITE PENINSULAS OF-"

"Relax, Ed; he's probably just chilling out somewhere." Eddy interrupted Ed with a well aimed snowball.

There was, however, one person who had a slight idea of where Double-D was hiding. And if she knew him right, he was doing anything but hiding.

She had only been to the swimming hole a handful of times before, but never in the winter. And since it was the _swimming _hole, nobody ever had a reason to go there in the winter. Except for one young man. Double-D.

'_There is no fucking way it was this huge the last time..._' She didn't stop to enjoy the sight of the frozen lake but headed straight up the cliff that overlooked the area. Once had she been there before; it was summer and Double-D took her to watch both the setting and rising of the sun. The most valued night of her life taking place in between.

"I had a feeling you would find me, my dearest friend. If you don't mind..." He didn't even look at her; he had known all along that she would come up there.

"I'd _love _to join you by your side, Oven mitt." She waded over to him where he was lying on a sleeping bag, next to a setup of thermoses, blankets, a telescope and his half open school bag.

"I was hoping you'd make it before dark, I would hate the idea of you missing any of them."

"I wouldn't dream of it, sweetie." He smiled, leaned in and kissed her tenderly.

They stayed like that, hand in hand, gazing into each other's eyes before, a mere twenty minutes later, turning over and gazing into the stars that suddenly appeared and filled the dark night sky.

_**And we'll have Halloween on Christmas  
And in the night, we'll wish this never ends  
We'll wish this never ends**_

He was still amazed by the fact that she could so easily get into his house. Not that it was a negative thing this time. It was just... Such a shock.

"Welcome home, Pumpkin Pie." A long life of loneliness had reduced Double-D's Christmases to nothing more than a day where his parents may or may not acknowledge his existence through something more than sticky notes. Imagine his surprise when he walked into a cross between a haunted mansion and Santa's Village. Candy canes and spider webs along the stair rail. Glittery skulls decorated the mantelpiece. And in the middle of the living room, a seven foot Christmas tree, fully decorated with living candles and a bat placed at the very top.

"Marie... What- What is-"He couldn't even finish the sentence. If there wasn't holly and colorful lights somewhere, there was either a life sized skeleton or a cauldron that spewed out smoke there instead.

"Weeeell... I was thinking about when your folks pulled you outta town for the fright night I had planned for Halloween and then what you said the other day about never really appreciating Christmas. So, I just put two and two together and here you are!" She smiled slyly and held out a plate with decapitated ginger bread men.

"This is-"He thoughtlessly grabbed one and bit off an arm; staring at Marie while he chewed. She was starting to become rather nervous and her smile faltered a bit.

"Yeah...?"

"This is... Perfect."

"Yeah?" Both their faces lit up in matching grins before she jumped into his arms, wrapping her legs around his waist, their lips and tongues performing a suite from The Nutcracker. She pulled her head back and bit her lip.

"Mistletoe." He followed her gaze upward and did indeed see a piece of mistletoe... With a tarantula hanging from it.

"I do like tradition."

"Mhm."

"Do you know something?"

"What?"

"You're fantastic. Absolutely fantastic."

"You know something, Christmas ribbon?"

"What?"

"So are you." Their smiling mouths connected once more before she jumped off of him. "You better wash your hands quickly because this little elf is gonna be all alone on the couch on a cold night like this..." She sauntered over to the couch, making sure that every curve in her body was getting a workout. Double-D had never entered his kitchen faster. Barely paying attention to the water, soap or towel, he quickly turned back to the living room and froze.

"Hey... Marie?"

"Yeah, Sugar plum?"

"Why is there a slaughtered reindeer in my kitchen?"

_**Where are you and I'm so sorry**_

_Marie, I... I'm sorry. I really am; I'm so sorry. But I'm also so very terrified. Terrified of what you're doing to yourself._

_I do know you and yes, I do trust you; with all my heart but... I knew and trusted Eddy too... I just- I just don't want you to get hurt. In any way. Ever. *silence* Where are you, my dear friend?_

_**I cannot sleep, I cannot dream tonight  
I need somebody and always  
**__**This sick strange darkness  
**__**Comes creeping on so haunting every time**_

There were nights when she was too excited or too tired to go to sleep (not that the thought of sleeping in the same bed as her two sisters was exciting) On those nights, she climbed on top of their trailer and looked out; imagining what was behind those fences and trees. How she would make something for herself and at least get out of Peach Creek. Travel the roads and just live; be happy. But there were also some nights when a boy, a very different boy, popped up in her head and caused her a bout of insomnia. And on the rarest of nights, she kept replaying the same seven seconds in her head, over and over.

They'd spent the afternoon at his house, working together on their science project. While most of the time, she did nothing but tease him, she actually had contributed with a lot more than a lot of people expected from her.

When he followed her to the door, he seemed incredibly nervous and with a furious blush across his cheeks for no apparent reason.

"Well... G-Goodbye, Marie."

"What, no kiss with that goodbye?" She puckered her lips and smirked slightly. "See yah, Oven mitt." Barely had she left his front lawn before she was spun around and...

He kissed her.

It was gentle, with care and tender but before she could react or kiss him back, their lips were torn apart and his front door was closed.

She touched her lips for what felt like the thousandth time that night. His lips had been on hers... With his sanction, for the first time. She had experienced seven seconds in heaven; pure bliss.

But... '_Why?_' There was a nagging question in the back of her mind. Why now? Why would Double-D, after years of enduring her torment, decide to kiss her? Did he actually have _some _sort of feelings for her? No, it must've been something else. Like... That reverse psychology thing. Or maybe he just gave up the fight.

Most people saw Marie Kanker as arrogant and bossy, stopping at nothing to get what she wanted. But the truth was that the tough exterior held a rather insecure interior. Growing up with Lee who... Really was arrogant and bossy, she had to adapt to survive and the part that she played in front of her sisters and mom soon became the part she played in the real life drama of Peach Creek.

But every time Double-D ran from her, every time she saw the kids reactions, getting to the point where her own reflection all broke down her self esteem; piece by piece.

She knew she wasn't pretty; she knew she could never get guys to swarm around her like Nazz did. Blue hair, yellow teeth, skinny as shit; the list grew longer every time she glanced in a mirror.

She lit up a cigarette and took a drag. Fuck the kids who did it because they think it's cool; Marie smoked because it relaxed her. It instantly calmed her whole system, especially on nights like those.

He'd kissed her. And she couldn't figure out why the fuck he'd wanted to.

_**And as I stared I counted  
Webs from all the spiders  
Catching things and eating their insides**_

"Yo! Double-D, you down here?" They both froze. Deciding to keep your relationship secret was difficult, especially when you've just gotten together and can't keep your hands off of each other.

"Quickly, behind there!" Diving next to the laundry machine, she peeked up to see Double-D straightening his shirt while hearing footsteps in the stairs. "Yes, Eddy!"

"What're you doing down here?" Marie groaned inwardly at the timing of her boyfriend's best friend.

"Oh, I just thought I would..." His words faded away when she quickly glanced at the corner opposite hers and couldn't stop staring. In what was the biggest web she had ever seen, a fat spider, the size of a child's hand, pounced on a small housefly. With morbid fascination, she witnessed how the insect was devoured slowly, like the arachnid knew it had a spectator and had to put on a show.

Suddenly, it stopped mid-movement. Marie had an eerie feeling it was observing her with its eight eyes. "Psst!"

She jolted and looked up, seeing Double-D slowly walking up the stairs on unsteady legs, carrying a beer keg on his back. She quickly looked back and the spider was gone.

_**Like the indecision to call you  
And hear your voice of treason**_

The rain fell harder than ever and it was getting more and more difficult to see out the windshield when Marie made a sudden U-turn, back to Peach Creek. Maybe... It would be for the better if they just talked. Even if they didn't, she knew she shouldn't be driving in rain that hard, the windshield threatening to break under the sheer force of it.

"Shit..." She picked up her cell phone from the passenger seat, dialed the familiar number and hesitated before the call button. Maybe it was for the better, not seeing each other for a while, spending the night apart and gain some perspective. It had been quite some time since they hadn't been together; ever since they went public, they had basically been joined at the hip.

But in the back of her mind, the words he called her never stopped whispering. He had called her beautiful. The most beautiful thing. And then he called her... Those things.

She was hurt. But she loved him. That was enough. She would be okay.

"Fuck!" The phone had slipped out of her grasp and down beneath the seat. The very moment she decided to ignore it, it started to ring. It was the only custom ringtone she had; it was _his _melody. Waiting be damned, she needed to just hear his voice. She glanced at the road before leaning down and rummaging around in search for the cellular device.

They say that the good die young. Marie Kanker never even saw the eighteen-wheeler swerving.

_**Will you come home and stop this pain tonight  
Stop this pain tonight**_

_It's me. Look... I went by your sisters' place and... They said you left with the car without so much as a word and... *sigh* I know you probably don't want to talk to me; at least not tonight. I accept and respect that. But you can't just take off driving in the middle of the night when it's pouring rain without saying something to someone! What would happen if you veered off the road or..._

_I- I don't think I'd be able to do this anymore if it wasn't for you. My life... Simply doesn't seem worth living without you. I feel like you've given me something else, something to strive and look forward to, something I've never felt before. And even though you've never believed me when I told you, you're the most beautiful thing I have ever seen. And I love you with all my heart._

_Please come home. I know I said some things but... It was a heat of the moment thing; most of them were just to hurt you there and then because... I could never see a thing wrong with you. I couldn't and I never will. You're... Fucking perfect to me, Marie. Never forget that. I... I love you._

_**Don't waste your time on me  
You're already the voice inside my head**_

He was sitting on his front door step when she arrived.

"Hey."

"Hello there." Pause.

"Why did you kiss me?"

"Because... The last couple of days, I've seen that there is so much more to you than... Well, the impression you've given most of our lives."

"What?"

"Oh, come on. Nobody, in barely any field, has ever corrected me! Except for once but I might have deserved that one..."

"What are you-"

"The combustion engine?"

"Ah..."

"If you hadn't seen my mistake, it would have blown up for certain."

"So... You kissed me because I saved you from humiliation?"

"No. I kissed you because you _knew _how to save me from humiliation."

"Oh."

"Marie, I would love to see more of _that _side. Maybe I-"

"Oh, shut up!"

"Pardon?"

"You heard me! I don't need you to reward me for doing something right and I sure as hell don't want you to fix me!"

"When did-"

"The voice in my head, telling me I'm ugly and worthless has already become your voice! Why would I want that voice to tell me those things in real life then?"

"But-"

"I liked you from the moment I saw you and I haven't got the faintest fucking clue why. We're nothing alike except the small interest we share in engines but that's it. I always imagined myself running off with some big, greasy mechanic and travelling the country and I was fine with that! But then you just have to come along with- with your stupid hat and clean cut boyish looks and your larger than life _dictionary of a fucking_ _brain_!"

"Marie, I-"

"No, you know what? Fuck you. I don't need this." She turned quickly and started to stalk away when she felt a gentle touch on her shoulder.

"If you would let me finish this time. You must have misunderstood me completely there. I kissed you because..." He blushed. "I liked the fact that you had that knowledge and could outperform me as a result. It showed me that there's something that you're really passionate about in this world... Besides chasing me around of course." A nervous laugh. "You proved me wrong; you proved to me that there're are sides of you that I don't even know about and... I just never really got to know you that well because of the... Ahem, unfortunate events."

"Yeah..."

"But know this; I would never attempt to 'fix' you. If you're not comfortable with showing the world the sides and emotions you show me; I respect that. But I would like to become more acquainted with you, only if you would like to, of course."

"... Yeah, I'd like that."

"Good then."

"Sorry I yelled."

"In your defense, I did sound sort of..."

"Pompous?"

"... Yes, I did." She laughed.

"So, we're going in to work or what?"

"Actually, if you wouldn't mind, we could do something outside, seeing how it's such a beautiful day."

"Aight, sounds nice."

"Do you have any suggestions?"

"There is one thing; if you don't think it's weird."

"Tell me."

"There's this simple... Game that my dad used to play with me when he was still around. You sit somewhere, we used to sit at a café, and just count the people walking to the left and to the right and the first to reach 100 wins. He'd always let me pick left because the café was just next to a big company building where, 5 o'clock, all the office rats would flow past us, coming from the right."

"That's-"

"We don't have to do it, you know, if you don't want to."

"I was actually going to say that it sounded rather entertaining." She grinned. "Shall I lead the way?"

"Always."

_**I miss you**_

There is a young man that comes into a local pharmacy every two weeks at noon, like clockwork. Buying his pills before leaving, smoking before and after the visit. All the personnel knew his name but no one could surely know his story. There were of course rumors flying around; how his best friend died of an accidental overdose, how his girlfriend's car was demolished one rainy night on the freeway or how he himself had started to do the very drugs he had once advocated against. Alas though, they were nothing more than mere rumors. What was certain was that not one of them had seen Eddward Hammer any other time than noon, every two weeks.

Then there was one day; one day that was special. He came at noon, as per usual, but didn't step inside. He quickly scanned the small locale before sitting down next to the entrance and lighting a cigarette.

Liz Harper had barely worked at her new job for two weeks but already she hated it. The long hours, the ungrateful customers and the ignorant complaints were already driving her insane, not to mention that most of the elderly that she served complained about her dyed, blue hair. She had spent ten minutes that morning banging her head against the living room coffee table after watching the news report on the PIDS outbreak. She knew the pharmacy would be overflowing with panicked hypochondriacs. Her mom was one of those people; she knew just how ugly it could get on days like that.

She sighed and groaned inwardly when she saw just how right she had been, barely giving a glance to the person staring into space next to the entrance. Mumbling excuses, she made her way through the crowd to her supervisor.

"Jackie, there's another homeless person sitting outside." Said Jackie stretched her neck to peek out the window and shook her head.

"Ain't no hobo, that's Mr. Hammer."

"Mr... Who?"

"Mr. Hammer, he must be here for his pills. Poor man, having his routine disturbed like this..."

"What?"

"He comes in every two weeks to get his pills and that's it; never says a word."

"What's wrong with him?"

"Nobody knows. Some say his best friend overdosed and died, some say his girlfriend crashed and some say completely ludicrous things. Me, I just think he's depressed with a touch of OCD."

"Aight..." Vague images of news segments flashed before her eyes.

"Here, be a doll and give 'em to him, will you? I'd hate to have him sit out there all day, poor lad."

"Aight." Liz grabbed the pill jar labeled 'HAMMER, EDDWARD' and waded through the crowd again, not even bothering to say anything this time.

She pushed open the door and looked down at the man sitting next to the door. He looked... Broken. Like he had given up the will to live a long time ago. Yet he couldn't have been more than 23. A glance at the jar in her hands made her jaw drop.

'_Barely 19?! And he looks like that?!_'

_Left_

_Right_

_Right_

"Mr. Hammer?"

_Lef- Righ-_

'_Damn, lost my count.' _He slowly moved his head upwards until his eyes met hers and it took all her willpower not to call her mom and cry until there were no more tears. The eyes that met hers were stone dead. No life, no emotion, no nothing.

"I... I have your... Your medication here." He slowly raised himself off the ground, like an old man afraid of breaking, until she had to look slightly upwards.

She became unnerved when he did nothing but stare at her for a good minute, taking in her full appearance. She couldn't hide the surprise when he nodded weakly, almost unnoticeable, and extended a hand holding a couple of dollar bills.

"Thank... You." Uncertainly, she took the bills and placed the jar in his still open hand. With that, he slowly swooped past her and continued down the street like nothing had happened. He perplexed her; what could possibly have happened in his life to make him like this? "Mr. Hammer!" She called out his name before she could even think about it. He stopped dead in his tracks and turned around slowly.

"I... Could I- I mean... The way you... You don't have to answer but... Is it true? Did- Did she die?" Those eyes stared back and she almost instantly regretted the question. If possible, his eyes darkened even more. If they hadn't been staring at each other, Liz would've missed that Eddward moved his head, even the slightest.

"In... In a car-"He nodded slowly. "I'm... Your best friend too?" Another weak nod. "I... I'm sorry. I really am sorry, Mr. Hammer." Insecurely, she slowly raised her hand until she softly grazed his arm to show comfort. And for the first time, his eyes softened, even the slightest.

"I'm Liz by the way. Liz Harper."

"You remind me of someone, Liz Harper. Someone I miss."

Mr. Hammer had been into the pharmacy 26 times. He only ever spoke once.


End file.
